2004-02-07/1:27 p.m.

last night was all things wonderful

kissing while i should have been getting dressed, bickering on the train, strangers saying cute things to us while we walked to the bar, buying orange juice and a multi-level grocery store, inhaling donuts at a canadian trademark, dancing to oldies and latin music while melted snow dripped on us, inventing songs to pass the time.

then there was the show. it. kicked. ass. harmony is all things wonderful, and the boy believes that too.

text messaging each other while i argue with my dad on the way home, making out in the car at the train station before hurriedly driving home, eating a pot of leftover spaghetti while strangling the parmesan cheese, discovering parts of each other that no one has ever seen.

im still sore from drawing out that road map with him. theres one crossroad that makes me cry crocodile tears and wince in pain. i realize now that its always been that way, but that ive instinctually stayed away from it. perhaps i should pay a doctor to inspect it.

my mother woke me up, crying, and apologized for bringing a certain love into my life. i dont want him to leave. i just want him to get help.

and no recording with the band today, because im terrified of my own voice.

happy post-two monthiversary, boy. i love you.