2006-06-25/12:57 a.m.

drink, drank, drunk

third night in a row, but this time on cider and vex. however, i am very proud that i am going into my bed alone. i shall not seduce a gal i have known for less than a week (three days, really). i shall not.

especially not one that used to date a guy that slept with one of my roomies and almost dated another.

i should know her at least a week. at least.

too bad im leaving in a week. too bad indeed. where has the summer gone?

oh, yes.. i have spent it flipping channels, eating soy grilled cheeses and trying to forget how lonely i am. and how independent i am.

i just hate being confident enough to solve my own problems in whatever town they may be in, but not being happy enough to get out of bed. back on the pills i will go. i will.

and i will do my best not to sob over the boy. he is wonderful and i must remember he has a life that isnt all about me..

man, i so shoulda asked that gal to sleep over. so shoulda.

but didnt we feel like the bisexual sluts at the kegger while playing i have never? yes, yes, we did.

i do miss autumn though. nine years is an awful long time to know somebody. i just wish i was less self-conscious and was closer with her. however, we are never at a loss for witty banter or talk of cute kittens. never. cmon.. kittens!

i. am. so. drunk.

away from the keyboard nnnnnnnnow.