2007-02-11/3:43 p.m.

and by wonder, i mean hope.

sometimes i wonder if the immediacy of the world is a myth concocted just to make me feel guilty, that the finite notion of time is miscalculated by scientists that secretly harbour regrets for not studying literature or cultural theory.

but then i realize that is further proof that i am a mentally unwell snob that should continue to take her prescribed medication.

bleh. i cant even commit to one tense anymore. as if i could before? sigh.

im going to go throw out the soup that could have been and try an even simpler one.

if i mess up this 'chicken' noodle soup though, i will admit defeat to the culinary goddesses once and for all.

speaking in absolutes again, are we? what happened to those lovely shades of gray that you pretend to be so passionate about?

oh, yes, i forgot. you are the exception. you break every rule, and yet you are the poster gal for recurring episodic depression with a dash of panic disorder thrown in for good measure. please excuse my mistake.

i really must stop conversing with myself so much. i should get back to talking to the cat. he doesnt care if my soup ever turns out right or if i ever become a folkrockstar.